Thursday 4 November 1999

Ersite hematesum altsa.

meta-date: Thu Nov 4 10:06:00 1999

Welcome to thy judgement day.  Need to rid myself of the stench of desperation.  Still Naked, Still Alone - but no longer shivering - progress.   Desperation stems from unfulfilled hopes, but without hope there is no motivation.   I half believe that the relaxing influence of alcohol will mask the desperation, but therein lies madness.  Going shopping soon.  Lose myself in spending.   Except there isn't much that I want at the moment - just an exceptionally fucking huge TV which I can't afford without saving up for a few months.  Vortex is back.   I fear the future.