Did everything wrong. God I wish I'd thought to try and kiss her before leaving. She probably would have just pushed me away - but at least I would know. I was so confused by the fact that she seemed to like me that I didn't think. I really hope I meet her again and she feels the same way; or the way I think she felt anyway. The way I hope she felt. I can't believe that the most beautiful woman there seemed to like me. God - I hope it wasn't just me being pissed. Oh fuck. Oh shit. How am I supposed to sleep after being such a fuckwit? I can't believe that tonight actually happened.
Saturday, 30 October 1999
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