Thursday 19 August 1999


meta-date: 199908191518

Beautiful people every way I turn. My feelings on this vary from day to day - some days it depresses me, other days I find it uplifting. Today it tugs my heart in both directions. I like to see beautiful people frown - it's strangely satisfying to know that they have troubles too. I don't like thinking that - I don't want the pain of others to give me pleasure. I am very conscious of looking at people. I am not very good at eye contact - whenever I catch someone's eye I look away because I find it impossible to imagine that they would want me looking at them - so I look away to spare them. It's the beginning of a very long work day. Got up too early this morning - a complex task ahead of me in the early hours - I need to be fresh, but that isn't likely. Need to make sure I make myself a foolproof plan - if such a beast exists. I wonder how long it will take for Andy's copy of EverQuest to arrive. He is using my account until his copy arrives - we had our first clash today - Andy was playing when I connected and I took over his connection - it bypassed the character selection screen end I just appeared in the world - there were a few moments where I was "wtf? where am I?." didn't take long to realise though... All done. Bye for now.