Sunday 8 August 1999


A plate of stew and a pipe of three nuns - first pipe I've smoked in a couple of months. Feeling nice & relaxed. Terrorvision's excellent "How to make friends and influence people" playing in the background. Can't get my pipe lit, but it doesn't matter. I don't know why I gave it up. I think it was because I fancy someone that I know doesn't smoke. As if that was the only thing she wouldn't like about me, lol. I fancy just about anyone: three rules - female, human, alive. If you're all three then I'll probably fancy you - if you fail on any one point, you've got no chance. Time to try a third match. Tobacco is nicely scorched on top - should take this time. That's the ticket. Lava lamps bubbling away nicely. Sherlock Holmes seems always to be pictured with a bent pipe - like the one I'm smoking now - but in the books it was usually a clay pipe. In the illustrations they always looked straight. Another thing to thank Hollywood for I guess. Spent too long writing - it's gone out again...

Smoke drifts
Lazy upward journey
Troubles travel with it
They will be back
That matters not
I am content
For now

All hail Dog
Almighty deity
With silky coat
And healthy wet nose

Pretend best friend. All that I've got.

Under the lens
Scrutiny unending
Will I make the grade?
Will the darkness hide the scars?

Reflections from a million facets
Mind like a shattered mirror
Beautiful in it's way
But flawed and worthless to most

For sale - one soul
One careless owner
May be scarred beyond saving
Yours if you want it
If you fancy a challenge

Hate - unfocussed energy - someone please be my lens - help me focus this hate into love.

Sleep comes - ready to take me into her embrace. Carry me away to a better place. It will not last forever, but while we are together I will be happy.